Family Cruise Advisor

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I had cruised with my mom, my dad, and my children, but never all at once. The “idea” of cruising with both offspring and parents always had seemed like a great idea, but yet there was that nagging fear we’d all drive each other crazy. Still, I had to give it a try. When opportunity knocked I forged ahead and not only planned a cruise for us, but vowed to enjoy it. My husband claimed he couldn’t take leave from work (oh sure), so it would be the five us.

Want to cruise with your extended family? See Heidi’s seven tips to make yours a successful and fun family cruise at the bottom of this post. Got some tips of your own? Share them in our comments section below.

I booked the brood on a 10-night cruise roundtrip out of Singapore to Thailand and Malaysia aboard the Costa Marina (these days fleetmate Costa Romantica is doing similar routes). The cozy, homey Marina was a great way for my folks to get a taste of Asia and by far the most convenient mode of transport for a pair of testosterone-fueled little boys, two 60-somethings with medical issues, and a tightly-wound mother-child who still struggles with not sweating the small stuff.

Part senior citizen’s home, day-care center and booze cruise, my survival instincts kicked in and it didn’t take long for me to see the ship as the ideal setting for a family reunion. Safe and nurturing, it was small enough to feel intimate and easy to navigate, yet stocked with the stuff needed to oil the family machinery — from doctors (just in case) to good food and a doting crew (and yes, lots of wine).

My mother lit up in the presence of our charming Romanian restaurant waiter Valentin, a good sport who always found time to make small talk and paper airplanes at dinner in the elegant Cristallo restaurant. Grandma and grandpa looked forward to chatting with their favorite waiter in Harry’s Bar each afternoon, where they convalesced with a cocktail after a slow stroll around the ship. The cheerful faces of Carola and Ronaldo in the Squok playroom were always a welcome sight when it was time to drop off the boys for a few hours.

The crew became a surrogate extended family and the ship our caravan. Grandsons and grandparents bonded often and easily thanks to our side-by-side cabin set up. I could lean out of my cabin door and knock on theirs and in a jiffy send one or both of the boys over when I needed a break.

Evenings, grandma usually wanted to call it a night after dinner, so she snoozed with the kids for a few hours (feeling useful and content) while father and daughter went out for a night cap.

The age-old cruise rituals — the captain’s cocktail party, dressing for dinner and glittery production shows — were traditions we all enjoyed. It was sweet to see the boys and grandpa in ties on formal nights and to witness both child’s and grandparent’s wide-eyed awe of the dazzling costumes and headdresses worn by the dancers. My parents were great at helping to entertain the boys at dinner with tic tack toe, paper airplanes and story telling.

Of course, the occasional bouts of familial burn-out are to be expected on vacation, but with multiple care givers on hand, someone always got a break.

Highlights of our trip:

• In Laem Chabang, Thailand, grandpa did the Bangkok tour alone, not minding the two-hour bus trip (each way) to see the stunning gold-spired temples of the Grand Palace. Meanwhile, grandma, the kids and I took a short taxi ride to Pattaya beach to play in the sand and eat KFC.
• In Phuket, I hired a taxi for the five of us. We went temple hopping, elephant riding and swimming at the beach.
• In Penang, grandma stayed on board, while the rest of us sweated our way around town on a trishaw tour.

One day I dropped off the boys at the playroom and went touring by myself in Mallaca. The tender was delayed getting back to the ship, so once on board, I sprinted to the playroom and found it closed and the kids no where in sight. A moment of alarm melted away when I found the boys happily playing with grandpa and grandma in their favorite lounge. Seems my father anticipated I might be late and had picked the kids up for me. That was one of many instances during the cruise where I really appreciated the family bond we shared. I’d take another cruise with the whole lot any time.

7 Tips For A Successful Cruise For The Whole Family

1. Booking cabins on the same deck makes meeting up with family members convenient, but you might want to avoid side-by-side cabins, as cruise ship walls are very thin and sounds easily carry (as in your voice complaining about them or as in Uncle Bob hearing your comings and goings).
2. On the other hand, connecting cabins that share an interior door can really work for families with several kids — mom and dad are in one room and on the other side of the door are the giggling kids. Everyone has their space.
3. If traveling with a large family and you need eight or more cabins, many cruise lines offer a group discount, so ask about it when booking.
4. Though four in a standard cabin might seem tight, I’ve done it many times. My boys love climbing up to the “bunk” (upper) berths and more importantly, four in a cabin can be a great way to save money (the third or forth person in a cabin is often charged about half the full fare).
5. Togetherness is golden, but familiarity breeds contempt — it’s ok to carve some alone time for your self and/or your immediate family; togetherness doesn’t have to mean 24 hours a day. When cruising with my parents and kids, we’d always have dinner together and go to the show after, but for breakfast and lunch we often ate separately.
6. In port, it’s often cheaper and much more flexible to hire a van or large car for your family to explore the sights instead of signing up for the ship’s pricey excursions. Do a little research before your cruise to see what your local options are in port.
7. Don’t miss the photo ops, when cruising with my parents and kids, I always make sure I get some good group shots taken by the ship’s photographer to capture the priceless memories.